Beating my Muse with a Keyboard

My life as a writer and a polyamorous free-range kinkster.

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Location: Tempe, Arizona, United States

I am a Fashion Design Student, at Mesa Community College. I want to change the relationship most of us have with clothes we wear. I am married to my husband Cinder, and we with live his other husband, our daughter, dog and three terrapins in Tempe, AZ.

Friday, July 04, 2008

Day 2

More fun then you can shake a stick at.

AS I write this I am in the Fat Burger at Metro Center, Peoria and I-17. I sat in on the recording of the Slice of Sci-Fi voicemail show, (Mike, Brian and the regulars decided to only do voicemail this week. I only had a couple of hiccups on the way over. As soon an I finish my Fat Burger, I'm going to the gym and put in a couple of hours before going home.

* * *

I got home, but I did not stop at the gym. On my way in I could see a thunderstorm brewing over the Phoenix Metro area. So I just went home feed the dogs and we are waiting out the storm before going out on our nightly walk.

As for the drive home it went without a hitch, I didn't even get cut off.

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Thursday, July 03, 2008

Fun and frustration.

Day 1 as a full time motorcycle rider.

Today I needed to run a couple of errands, pay some bills etc. My first stop was the Post Office, other then random stalling at lights and stop signs; I made it with out any problems. Leaving the Post Office I almost dropped Syrne. I forgot to practice leaving drive ways, doh.

My next stop was SRP's local office; I made it there with out a problem leaving on the other hand was another matter. I flooded the engine trying to keep her running, again with the doh.

It took me 20 minutes to get her restarted, ugh. My errands done I had lunch at On the Border, meh. My last errands were a stop by Wally-World for a smaller lunchbox and a movie. Wall-E was very good, funny and fewer kids then Hulk.

On my way home I was cut off twice by the same cow in a minivan. Both times she was just trying for a better spot at a red light. The Bitch also almost ran into the back of another motorcycle. There are times I really want to be a cop, or mount a video camera. Tomorrow I'm going to be at the Slice of Sci-Fi recording. I think I need a long drive to get truly comfortable in the saddle.

I really enjoyed riding my bike today, even cussing as I sat on the side of the road waiting for the fuel to evaporate.

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Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Why I bought a Motorcycle

Or is that your new bike or your midlife crisis?

More then once since Friday I have been asked why I bought the motorcycle. (Mostly by people I would not consider friends, coworkers etc.) I could justify; saying it was because of the rising cost of fuel. That is true. I could also say that I have always wanted a bike. That is true as well.

The source of this posting occurred last night. I was at work in a stall of the employee restroom. I over heard one of my coworkers asked another if I was compensating for the recent loss of my wife. (They did not know I was in the stall and I didn't reveal myself.) Awkward, and to be honest, I think I am in some manner.

So let’s go over all three of those reasons in turn:

Gas is not going to get any cheaper anytime soon (I think it will dip around election time, but it will stay over $3.50 a gallon and just go up from there.) My truck has a 20+ gallon fuel tank, last time I gassed it all the way up I paid 80 dollars. My ‘02 Dodge Ram 1500 Quadcab, AKA; Skan gets pretty good gas mileage. He is averaging about 13.6 miles to the gallon, according to the built in trip computer. About 20-26 on the freeway. Depending on if I can get away with 55-65 mph, (It is far too dangerous around here to not keep up with traffic.)

According to my math at current prices I'm putting in $300.00 a month in fuel into the truck. It is paid for but that does not include insurance & maintenance. Payments, insurance and fuel will be about $200.00 a month for Syrne. Even if gas prices double I can afford to drive to work & visit friends.

Before Kelly passed away, we had talked about buying another vehicle, something cheaper on gas, for me to drive back and forth to work. The 3 miles is just enough to warm the trucks engine up, and none of the trip is at anything over 50 mph.

We had even discussed a little 250cc Honda Rebel that a former coworker was selling, until a Suicider on a Crotch-Rocket dropped his bike in front of us. He was only wearing a wife beater, shorts and flip-flops. No amount of "I am not that stupid" would convince her. He lived by the way, fragged his left calf and arm but he lived. I know that statistics, I will drop my bike. When that day comes I will be fully and properly clothed with a helmet on my head.

As for the second part, I had a motorcycle when I was a kid. My Mother and Step-Father made the mistake of saying if you build one you can have it, when I kept bugging them about it. Within a week I had acquired the parts and in three a friend’s dad was welding the engine into place.

That bike lasted until just before the start of school when the throttle stuck wide open. The clutch would not engage the shifter broke off and the brakes had always sucked. So I kicked away and let it slide out into traffic, cussing the whole time. The bike went under a semi and was destroyed. It didn't let the truck off easy either, taking out the big rigs air lines & inside drive tires. I have wanted another bike ever since.

As for the last part; Yeah there is a part of me that is screaming 'Fuck It; Eat, Drink and Make Love to Mary and Beth. For Tomorrow We May All Be Dead." That live for today attitude is there, denying it will not make it go away. But in acknowledging it I can mitigate and deal with it. Kelly would kill me all over again if I left the dogs on purpose. I don't want to leave life. I enjoy life and I have good friends in the Real and Virtual worlds.

I wish she was here, and I don’t think I would have bought Syrne if she was. But at the same time I know that she is not in any pain. I would give anything to have her back with me without the constant pain she was in. But that can not happen so I need to go on living my life. I know she would want me to she said as much and on more then once.

So yeah I bought my motorcycle because the rising cost of fuel, I have always wanted a bike and I am compensating for the loss of my wife. All of that. So Mary and Beth call me.

PS: you can see pics of Syrne on my flicker at http://tinyurl.com/4pzu5a

BTW: Syrne, is a 600cc silver 2007 Honda Shadow. Yeah I name my vehicles, home, computers, even my cell phone. The fucking US navy does it and then calls the Theodor Roosevelt a she on top of that.

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